Hi guys. I feel so alone in this matter. I just do not know what to do. My son seems to be getting violent. He is the most caring and loving boy. The ADHD is getting too strong for my boy to handle. He is on adderall and risperdal. Every day except Tues. I got a call from the school telling about my son behavior. Well today I was shock embarrassed and angry but most of all I am so heart broken to hear that he punched a girl on the head! :( He has never done that before. He would run out, ask for a time out but never had he hurt anyone especially a girl. We teach our children that we do not hit and tell my son never never hit a girl. Big consequences for that one.
We do not even spank in our home, one time I did just two weeks ago, when he slapped a teachers hand out of the way so that they could not get to the phone and call me. I talked about it on this site. My frustration is what so I do. This violence deal is way out of my league. Punching a girl out!! If my son did not have this monster condition I would take him to juvie. I swear I would!
My question is: Do I take him to a behavioral hospital? His doctor cannot see him until July which totally sucks. His play therapist is great but I think my son may be beyond play therapy I don't know. I could not bring my self to spank him again. It did not help when I did it the last time! My son could be beat till he is black and blue and would turn around and spontaneous do unacceptable behavior again. Right now his consequence is sitting on the sofa and doing nothing . no TV, computer, or playing. He is getting the silent treatment from me and I think that is really bothering him. Thank you for listening to me and if anyone out there with a similar situation please please share with me. What do you do about the violence? Help Pats

Hello Patsy: You are not alone in this and I have been in similar situations like you that my son (almost 5 years) almost got expelled from school. I have my son in homeopathic remedies Bright Spark and Focus Formula from Native remedies.com and his agressiveness decreased with this remedies but still having some agressive days. I know some people do not believe in homeopathy but I just wanted to mention to you anyway that I saw results with it My son is not taking any medications. Have you made changes to his diet like not eating dairy products, home made foods without preservants. Right now I am looking into making changes to my son's diet, maybe the Feignhol diet or this link or website is not as rigid as the Feinghold diet http://newideas.net/adhd/adhd-diet.

I read your son gets play therapy? Is he getting behavior therapy? Does he have his own shadow and attending special Ed? My son has his own shadow and she keeps in track in regards to his behavior. Please call your doctor again and insists that it is urgent that he sees your soon ASAP, insits and insits!!!!!!!!

I hope you feel better and I send you a warm hugs from Los Angeles

Patsy, Maritza is right, change his diet. But I also believe in spanking when it is needed. I give my son a lot of second changes. When he acts up, I put up my thumb and tell him that by the time my third finger goes up, then he is in big trouble. I hardly ever have to put up the third finger anymore. He is going on 8 yrs old soon. I also, don't believe in the traditional activities that most people speak about for their adhd children. I make my son read the newspaper, write stories and speeches, play golf and chess. These are all activities that pushes a person to slow down, take their time and concentrate. Now that he had been doing these activites for so long, he has trained his own mind to slow down in most other activities. I bought the taebo workout dvd for him to give him the stimulating exercise that he needs. He goes swimming twice a week at the ymca, and swings a lot on the swingset that my husband built. He's in a public speaking competition this week for the closing of the school yr. Of course I'm a little nervous, but since I read the speech and recorded it on tape, he get to hear my voice doing it and the pace that I want him to go in. He has been practicing immulating my tone for weeks now, which is helping him to speak slower. Get you son some training books to read: "I'm not bad, I just mad" or adhd workbook for kids. You can find a lot of these on amazon.com. Recite to him what you want him to know and have him take dictation. Then use it as a guide to write over and over again when ever he acts out. The repetition will make him so angry and bored that he will slow down on acting up so he doesn't have to do the writing so much. If you like you can contact me offline and we can talk over the phone about other ideas I've used that have worked.

Hi guys, I thank you for your responds I will definitley take your advice on the homeopathic remedies. I have worked on his diet. except for hot dogs. That is a process food. He drinks lactose fat free milk. The one thing I did not know about is the shadow!! Who shadows him? another teacher? Please elaborate. Now behavior therapy is it incorporated with occupational therapy? He is getting tested again for special ed because last year he did not make it. I cannot understand that. They see the behavior the frustrations and the freaking out, and on the flip side of that the see his true colors when his disorder in not taking place. The caring gentle 8yr old.
Today I drove him to school and 10 minutes into my drive back home the school calls and tells me he had been suspended for 2 days. I swear I heard them say he was in school suspension! I was just in total shock when I heard he had punched a girl!! That is not him. I called the behavior hospital yesterday and she told me that if they kept him it would be for 3 to 7 days!! I replied with that would totally make him worse. They told me of an out pt. service.
I don't know. If his docs will not see him until July, what do I do? The couselor told they would asess him and go from there. Do you guys think? Normaly I can make these decitions, but for some reason I cannot think. Please help with a responds. I feel I should nip this on the butt before he gets older and stronger, but how do I do that!!
Thank you all so much!

Patsy, I am reading a book called The ADHD and ADD Diet. It has several approaches of how to treat these symptoms through diet and vitamin/mineral supplements. You can have your son tested for food sensitivities and vitamin deficiencies. I suggest you go that route and find out exactly what foods he is sensitive to instead of guessing. This will help you tackle these behaviors a lot faster. I have done this with my daughter who is now 4 and have seen immediate results. I hope this helps and works for you. Good luck.
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

-----Original Message-----
From: "Patsy M." <familywithADDorADHD@groups.care.com>
Date: Fri, 21 May 2010 11:26:06
To: <familywithADDorADHD@groups.care.com>
Subject: [familywithADDorADHD] My Son

Hi guys, I thank you for your responds I will definitley take your advice on the homeopathic remedies. I have worked on his diet. except for hot dogs. That is a process food. He drinks lactose fat free milk. The one thing I did not know about is the shadow!! Who shadows him? another teacher? Please elaborate. Now behavior therapy is it incorporated with occupational therapy? He is getting tested again for special ed because last year he did not make it. I cannot understand that. They see the behavior the frustrations and the freaking out, and on the flip side of that the see his true colors when his disorder in not taking place. The caring gentle 8yr old.
Today I drove him to school and 10 minutes into my drive back home the school calls and tells me he had been suspended for 2 days. I swear I heard them say he was in school suspension! I was just in total shock when I heard he had punched a girl!! That is not him. I called the behavior hospital yesterday and she told me that if they kept him it would be for 3 to 7 days!! I replied with that would totally make him worse. They told me of an out pt. service.
I don't know. If his docs will not see him until July, what do I do? The couselor told they would asess him and go from there. Do you guys think? Normaly I can make these decitions, but for some reason I cannot think. Please help with a responds. I feel I should nip this on the butt before he gets older and stronger, but how do I do that!!
Thank you all so much!

http://www.care.com/group/member/discussions.do?groupId=19 > View Discussions

Care.com is a secure site that respects your privacy. For more information view our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy at Care.com.

At Care.com, we do not send unsolicited emails. If you no longer want to receive these emails, please modify your group communication preferences.

Care.com and the Care.com logo are trademarks of Care.com, Inc. © 2007-2010 Care.com, Inc. All rights reserved.

Care.com, Inc. | 1400 Main Street | Waltham | MA | 02451
[familywithADDorADHD] tracking -- do not delete or modify text below or your reply will appear as a new topic

$[133.313.1274455561356200853997@groups.care.com]

Hi- I have to say that I would do whatever youhave to do toget your child to a psychiatrist.Some children have worsening violence with stimulants - if you have seen worsening of those symptoms, you need to get him evaluated!

Hi Sandra
thank you for that suggestion. I will get my son tested for food sensitivities and vitamin deficiencies.
My son never had these types of issues until now. The medicines who keep him in check. Is it possible that his little body is becoming immune to these types of meds.? Maybe for this reason it would be a good idea to try homeopathic remedies. I am so wanting to run away, but I'm not don't worry it just feels good to say it!!! I think I am going to need meds myself. I do take zoloft and man it takes the edge off. Thanks again Patsy

Hi Becky thanks for that, but he has been on these for a while now. Have you had this experience where the psychotropics have stopped working? Share with me your situation if you don't mind.
Thanks. I think I will go have him evaluated at the behavioral hospital, hope this does not come back and bite me! Thanks

Who tests for food "sensitivities"? Vitamin deficiencies are regular pediatrician, right? Pediatrician and allergist both say there is not a test for sensitivities except by elimination and trial and error of manipulating the diet.

When my daughter was 2 there were thoughts that she may be on the Autism spectrum. Because she was only 2 no one wanted to give her that diagnosis. I took her to a DAN! (Defeat Autism Now Dr). She is the one that ran the food sensitivity test. The blood test was able to identify exactly what foods she was sensitive to. We had to eliminate cows milk, goats milk, eggs, wheat and Gluten, pineapple, bananas and all cheeses. After eliminated all of these foods for one month, my daughter went from being super hyper and non-social, hardly any eye contact to a calmer social little girl. She actually engaged with others and looked at you. This was only after one month. She was on that diet for a year to see what would happen, well all that changed was her hyper activity. All of the ADHD symptoms came back and I have decided to go through this again except I am adding in vitamins, minerals and amino acids that I read may cause these symptoms.
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

-----Original Message-----
From: "Julie S." <familywithADDorADHD@groups.care.com>
Date: Fri, 21 May 2010 12:27:53
To: <familywithADDorADHD@groups.care.com>
Subject: [familywithADDorADHD] My Son

Who tests for food "sensitivities"? Vitamin deficiencies are regular pediatrician, right? Pediatrician and allergist both say there is not a test for sensitivities except by elimination and trial and error of manipulating the diet.

http://www.care.com/group/member/discussions.do?groupId=19 > View Discussions

Care.com is a secure site that respects your privacy. For more information view our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy at Care.com.

At Care.com, we do not send unsolicited emails. If you no longer want to receive these emails, please modify your group communication preferences.

Care.com and the Care.com logo are trademarks of Care.com, Inc. © 2007-2010 Care.com, Inc. All rights reserved.

Care.com, Inc. | 1400 Main Street | Waltham | MA | 02451
[familywithADDorADHD] tracking -- do not delete or modify text below or your reply will appear as a new topic

$[133.319.127445927207176028817@groups.care.com]

Where can you go to get the done for food sensitivities. My daughter pediatrician said that there is no such test
Sent via BlackBerry from T-Mobile

-----Original Message-----
From: "Sandra C." <familywithADDorADHD@groups.care.com>
Date: Fri, 21 May 2010 11:40:17
To: <familywithADDorADHD@groups.care.com>
Subject: [familywithADDorADHD] My Son

Patsy, I am reading a book called The ADHD and ADD Diet. It has several approaches of how to treat these symptoms through diet and vitamin/mineral supplements. You can have your son tested for food sensitivities and vitamin deficiencies. I suggest you go that route and find out exactly what foods he is sensitive to instead of guessing. This will help you tackle these behaviors a lot faster. I have done this with my daughter who is now 4 and have seen immediate results. I hope this helps and works for you. Good luck.
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

-----Original Message-----
From: "Patsy M." <familywithADDorADHD@groups.care.com>
Date: Fri, 21 May 2010 11:26:06
To: <familywithADDorADHD@groups.care.com>
Subject: [familywithADDorADHD] My Son

Hi guys, I thank you for your responds I will definitley take your advice on the homeopathic remedies. I have worked on his diet. except for hot dogs. That is a process food. He drinks lactose fat free milk. The one thing I did not know about is the shadow!! Who shadows him? another teacher? Please elaborate. Now behavior therapy is it incorporated with occupational therapy? He is getting tested again for special ed because last year he did not make it. I cannot understand that. They see the behavior the frustrations and the freaking out, and on the flip side of that the see his true colors when his disorder in not taking place. The caring gentle 8yr old.
Today I drove him to school and 10 minutes into my drive back home the school calls and tells me he had been suspended for 2 days. I swear I heard them say he was in school suspension! I was just in total shock when I heard he had punched a girl!! That is not him. I called the behavior hospital yesterday and she told me that if they kept him it would be for 3 to 7 days!! I replied with that would totally make him worse. They told me of an out pt. service.
I don't know. If his docs will not see him until July, what do I do? The couselor told they would asess him and go from there. Do you guys think? Normaly I can make these decitions, but for some reason I cannot think. Please help with a responds. I feel I should nip this on the butt before he gets older and stronger, but how do I do that!!
Thank you all so much!

http://www.care.com/group/member/discussions.do?groupId=19 > View Discussions

Care.com is a secure site that respects your privacy. For more information view our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy at Care.com.

At Care.com, we do not send unsolicited emails. If you no longer want to receive these emails, please modify your group communication preferences.

Care.com and the Care.com logo are trademarks of Care.com, Inc. © 2007-2010 Care.com, Inc. All rights reserved.

Care.com, Inc. | 1400 Main Street | Waltham | MA | 02451
[familywithADDorADHD] tracking -- do not delete or modify text below or your reply will appear as a new topic

$[133.313.1274455561356200853997@groups.care.com]




http://www.care.com/group/member/discussions.do?groupId=19 > View Discussions

Care.com is a secure site that respects your privacy. For more information view our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy at Care.com.

At Care.com, we do not send unsolicited emails. If you no longer want to receive these emails, please modify your group communication preferences.

Care.com and the Care.com logo are trademarks of Care.com, Inc. © 2007-2010 Care.com, Inc. All rights reserved.

Care.com, Inc. | 1400 Main Street | Waltham | MA | 02451
[familywithADDorADHD] tracking -- do not delete or modify text below or your reply will appear as a new topic

$[133.314.1274456408551602257621@groups.care.com]

Hi Patsy M. My daughter had the same problem at school last year in the first grade. The principal even called the police on her. What I did was I went to the school and observed her in the classroom and on the playground. One day I was at school watching her playing when a student she was playing with started pulling and kicking her around the playground. When the teacher went over to break it you, the 1st thing the other child said to the teacher was that my was kicking him. If I wasn't there that day to what truly happen, the teacher would have taken the other kid story and my daughter would have been suspended again. My child was labeled a problem child and it didn't took her classmate long to figure out that all they have to do is to say that she did this and that and she would get in trouble. After the playground incident, and whenever something happen at school, I have her draw it first then using the pictures she could tell me step for step what happen.
Sent via BlackBerry from T-Mobile

-----Original Message-----
From: "Patsy M." <familywithADDorADHD@groups.care.com>
Date: Fri, 21 May 2010 11:26:06
To: <familywithADDorADHD@groups.care.com>
Subject: [familywithADDorADHD] My Son

Hi guys, I thank you for your responds I will definitley take your advice on the homeopathic remedies. I have worked on his diet. except for hot dogs. That is a process food. He drinks lactose fat free milk. The one thing I did not know about is the shadow!! Who shadows him? another teacher? Please elaborate. Now behavior therapy is it incorporated with occupational therapy? He is getting tested again for special ed because last year he did not make it. I cannot understand that. They see the behavior the frustrations and the freaking out, and on the flip side of that the see his true colors when his disorder in not taking place. The caring gentle 8yr old.
Today I drove him to school and 10 minutes into my drive back home the school calls and tells me he had been suspended for 2 days. I swear I heard them say he was in school suspension! I was just in total shock when I heard he had punched a girl!! That is not him. I called the behavior hospital yesterday and she told me that if they kept him it would be for 3 to 7 days!! I replied with that would totally make him worse. They told me of an out pt. service.
I don't know. If his docs will not see him until July, what do I do? The couselor told they would asess him and go from there. Do you guys think? Normaly I can make these decitions, but for some reason I cannot think. Please help with a responds. I feel I should nip this on the butt before he gets older and stronger, but how do I do that!!
Thank you all so much!

http://www.care.com/group/member/discussions.do?groupId=19 > View Discussions

Care.com is a secure site that respects your privacy. For more information view our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy at Care.com.

At Care.com, we do not send unsolicited emails. If you no longer want to receive these emails, please modify your group communication preferences.

Care.com and the Care.com logo are trademarks of Care.com, Inc. © 2007-2010 Care.com, Inc. All rights reserved.

Care.com, Inc. | 1400 Main Street | Waltham | MA | 02451
[familywithADDorADHD] tracking -- do not delete or modify text below or your reply will appear as a new topic

$[133.313.1274455561356200853997@groups.care.com]

Hi everly, Thanks for sharing it seems that we are experiencing the same thing. Last year they(school) threaten to call security because he was running they say out to the street. I told them very clear not to ever call security to call me first. Well guess what they did because they said he was running away!!! I was livid! I raised all kinds of hell. and they knew they had screwed up, but you know they all stick together and no one is going to say anything to the contrary. I feel that there is something wrong with the school system when they have to call security or in your case the police on a 7 or 8 year old! Don't you think. Teachers are much bigger than that age group and I feel they should be able to handle them. ( Bully teachers or not Hummmmm!)
There was an incident her in Tx. when a security guard was called on a young boy small 10yr old
and broke his arm when he was trying to restrain him. How awful was that? That is why I strongly tell the school NOT to call security to call me first!! They have suspended the security guard with pay pending on an investigation. If it was a parent who had done that we would have been locked up!!! Thanks Patsy

Hi I'm Rhonda Eby from Omaha, NE. I am not really a fan of discussion groups because I end up getting too rapped up in them and my time is used up. But I was reading some of the discussion and liked J Daphne's ideas about writing out dictated sentences as a consequence. I also like the concentration activities mentioned, although I never learned how to play chess. I have been at home with my 4 and 7 year old this summer due to a job loss and my 7 year old son was diagnosed with ADHD and I have ADD.

Thanks
Rhonda