About Ian

Heyo! Are you looking for a smooth-talking quick-witted street-smart person to watch your kids because you're too busy being a successful lawyer to spend the quality time with them that they deserve and are tired of the ghosts (in this case pirates) of your past breaking into your house at night and stealing your kids off to obscure islands ultimately resulting in you having to travel there via old friend (think fairy-sized) to rescue them and inadvertently using up all of your PTO in the process? Well hopefully not, because if that's the case you might wanna rethink some things. However if you're looking for someone who understands (more or less) references such as "skibidi," "rizz," and "no cap" and can regale your children with random stories about barber school in Mexico, then I'm your guy. Some other (probably relevant) info: Bilingual English and Spanish Martial arts experience yes, security experience no Helped raise younger siblings when growing up