There are a number of ways to incentivize and/or discipline children — and so much of a parent’s choice is dependent on the child (i.e. what works for one kid hits different for another). One discipline tactic is positive punishment, which, despite its name, does not equate to a “feel-good consequence,” notes Andrea Marano, a licensed clinical social worker specializing in family wellness in Yonkers, New York. “Instead,” she continues, “it involves adding something negative rather than taking something positive away.”
Here, Marano and other experts discuss the idea behind positive punishment, offer examples of it in practice and more.
What is positive punishment?
Positive punishment is when a parent/caregiver/teacher/coach, etc. adds a negative consequence to an unwanted behavior. “The goal of positive punishment is to decrease the ‘bad’ behavior by implementing something unpleasant,” explains Courtney Morgan, a licensed professional clinical counselor and founder of Counseling Unconditionally in Louisville, Kentucky. This theory is based on “operant conditioning,” a learning theory developed in the 1930s by psychologist B.F. Skinner.
Shari B. Kaplan, a licensed clinical social worker and founder and clinical director of Cannectd Wellness in Boca Raton, Florida, gives an example: “If a coach sees one of his players slacking off, being chatty and distracting other players, they may tell the distracting player to sit on the bench and reprimand them in front of the other players.”
The defining characteristic of positive punishment — which is sometimes referred to as “aversive positive punishment” — is that it adds something negative, such as being reprimanded in front of others or getting yelled at, as opposed to taking something away, such as video games, which is referred to as negative punishment.
“The goal of positive punishment is to decrease the ‘bad’ behavior by implementing something unpleasant.”
— Courtney Morgan, licensed professional clinical counselor
Positive punishment vs. positive reinforcement
Despite their similarity in sound, positive reinforcement is fundamentally different from positive punishment. The former, which is also a part of Skinner’s operant conditioning, is the addition of something positive after a positive behavior — i.e., telling a child “excellent job” after they clean up their room or giving a toddler a jelly bean after they use the potty.
“Positive punishment attempts to decrease or eliminate a behavior and positive reinforcement attempts to increase behavior,” explains Morgan.
Examples of positive punishment
While the theory behind positive punishment is adding a negative consequence in order to curb behavior, degrees can vary. Here, Marano and Morgan give examples of positive punishment scenarios:
- Reprimanding a child after they’re rude to a sibling.
- Putting a child in timeout after they’ve hit someone.
- Giving a child extra chores after they fail to complete their original ones.
- Giving a student extra homework after they’re disruptive or disrespectful in class (from a teacher).
- Implementing stricter rules and parameters when a teen misses their curfew.
A note on spanking: It’s not recommended. Not only does scientific research deem it ineffective — not to mention cruel — it ultimately causes more harm than good. According to the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) the following can result from corporal punishment (including spanking):
- Physical injury.
- Aggressive, defiant behavior in children.
- Altercations between the parent and child, along with a negative impact on their relationship.
- Mental health disorders and cognition problems.
- Substance abuse.
Benefits of positive punishment
While there are a number of variables to consider when choosing a discipline tactic, here are the benefits of positive punishment, according to Marano and Morgan:
- It offers concrete consequences kids can understand.
- It can be implemented quickly.
- It’s simple to do.
- It’s sometimes effective at decreasing undesirable behavior.
It’s also important to keep in mind that the efficacy of positive punishment is nuanced. For instance, some research has found that some forms of positive punishment, including timeouts, have proven to be more effective in the short term than the use of reasoning “when dealing with a toddler who was acting defiant or hitting.” Conversely, punishments have been found to be the least effective tactic for kids who are negotiating and/or whining.
Drawbacks of positive punishment
According to Morgan, “there are significantly more drawbacks” to positive punishment than benefits.” Among them, she includes:
- Creating fear or anxiety.
- Unwanted behavior resuming when the punishment isn’t received (for example, when the teacher is not looking).
- Creating or increasing aggression.
- Potential for abuse or harm (from parents).
Marano also adds that understanding the underlying cause of a child’s unwanted behavior is key, as in some cases, attention is what they’re after — even in the form of positive punishment.
“A child acting inappropriately with the intention of getting parental attention, whether positive or negative, will only continue if the consequence is adding reprimand or another way of giving them attention,” she says.
“A child acting inappropriately with the intention of getting parental attention, whether positive or negative, will only continue if the consequence is adding reprimand or another way of giving them attention.”
— Andrea Marano, licensed clinical social worker
Tips for effectively using positive punishment
Marano, Morgan and Kaplan advise against using any form of physical punishment, including spanking, when employing this tactic. They also recommend the following:
Make sure the punishment is actually punishment
If it’s attention the child is seeking, yelling at them after they engage in negative behavior isn’t going to curtail it, notes Marano. “It is important to make sure whatever punishment you are adding is something aversive to the person on the receiving end,” she explains.
Put an altruistic spin on the punishment
For parents and caregivers set on using positive punishment Morgan recommends steering the consequence in a helpful or reparative direction. “Some examples would be to serve the person who was harmed, volunteer or take responsibility for actions,” she says. “This helps children repair the harm that has been done and decrease unwanted behavior while minimizing potential negative impacts of positive punishment.”
Keep things judgment free
Regardless of the behavior tactic, Kaplan says parents and caregivers should never be judgmental while employing it. “When you offer the behavioral redirection/reinforcement without criticism or judgment, and you choose to be loving and firm, you will get the message across without causing harm to the child,” she says. “A winning combination.”
The bottom line
Choosing a discipline style is personal and what works for one kid — and one behavior, for that matter — may not work for another. That said, for parents, caregivers and teachers, etc. who wish to try positive punishment, it’s best to keep the consequences kind and compassionate toward others while making sure it’s not attention the child is after.
