Contrary to its name, negative reinforcement isn’t a bad thing. Rather than introducing something negative to deter bad behavior (otherwise known as punishment), this theory of parenting removes something negative to encourage good behavior. It’s easier to understand when you see some negative reinforcement examples.
What Is Negative Reinforcement?
First of all, it’s not punishment. You’re not doing something negative to the child to get them to behave a certain way. You’re doing the opposite — taking away something that they do not like (a “negative”). “When you use this procedure, you need to remember that it isn’t punishment,” says Corinna Bittle, a certified behavior analyst and owner of bitKIDS Behaviour Consulting.
“Instead, it is removing something to increase a behavior. You are going to do things such as removing extra work. This will be in response to a behavior that you want to see more of, so you are reinforcing the behavior you want to see more of in the future.” Because negative reinforcement is a reinforcement strategy, there aren’t any real worries with implementing it.
“Negative reinforcement is best used in close proximity to the behavior,” says Amy Webb, who has a doctorate in human development and family sciences. Bittle agrees. “The trick with reinforcement is that you need to be able to figure out what your child wants and you need to make sure that you are giving it to them for those behaviors you want to see — not for the behaviors you want to reduce.”
Webb warns that there are instances that using negative reinforcement may accidentally give you the outcome you weren’t hoping for. “For example, a child whines and pouts when made to eat his vegetables so the parents remove the vegetables from his plate. This just reinforces the child’s desire not to eat vegetables.” Negative reinforcement isn’t going to be appropriate in every situation.
Here are 4 negative reinforcement examples to show you how to use this technique with your kids:
- Help Clean Up
Your child is doing a great job helping you clean up a puzzle. You say, “I love all of your help. Know what? I’ll finish cleaning up now.” You have just removed part of your child’s work (cleaning up the puzzle). In the future, your child is more likely to help you clean up, because when he does, you reward him by removing some of the work. While this is a great compromise to get your children to help you with some of the housework, they may soon rely on your leniency every time you ask them to do a chore. Reserve this reward for when you are doing a big task or when they have been really helpful with the job at hand.
- Do Your Homework
We’ve all been there during the homework struggle. Your child doesn’t want to do their homework, so you nag them to just get it done. Then, a strange thing happens. They do their homework! Why? To get you to stop nagging. The nagging was negatively reinforcing the behavior of doing homework because your child wants to remove the negative stimulus — your nagging.
- Avoid Dinner Time Tantrums
To avoid a dinner time meltdown, you tell your child they may take five bites and then they are excused from the dinner table. At future dinners, they will know that you will allow them to get up from the table after eating five bites of their food, and you will avoid a tantrum.Even though you aren’t giving in to your child’s tantrum and removing the food altogether, they may soon jump right to the five bite rule at every meal. You don’t want a meal time battle the moment you set the food down on the table, so turn to the five bite rule when you are really struggling with getting your child to eat their dinner.
- Stay in Bed
You put your kiddo to bed, but he won’t stay there. To encourage him to stay put, you tell him he doesn’t have to make the bed in the morning if he stays in bed. By removing a chore he hates (making the bed), you’re encouraging his good behavior (going to sleep on time).The next time your child wants to get out of bed, he will reconsider it — is it worth having to make the bed the next day? The key to making this example work is picking the right chore to remove for your child. If your little one loves making the bed, pick a different chore as incentive.
Stephanie Glover is the author and photographer behind A Grande Life. When she doesn’t have her camera in her hands, you’ll find her with a cup of coffee.