True story: My mum friend Lori had a babysitter who shoplifted while watching her child and got caught by the police. A total nightmare for a parent.
While shoplifting on the job is an obvious no-no for a babysitter, there are a lot of behaviours you might not realise aren’t OK. The consequences? It may make you seem unprofessional, put the kids in danger or break the parents’ trust in you. In fact, finding a babysitter they like and trust is stressful for many parents, and can even sway them not to hire someone altogether.
To make sure you get hired—and keep getting work—here are 12 things you should never, ever do while babysitting.
1. Don’t take the kids out of the home without permission
To prevent worry and safety concerns, parents like to always know where their child is. If you’ve been hired for a date night or regular after-school babysitting job, they’re assuming you and the kids are going to stay at home.
You should always get permission in advance to take someone’s child somewhere. The only exception is if it’s an emergency situation.
In the same vein, if you do have permission to take the children somewhere and you don’t go, the parents should be informed of that, too.
For example, if the child was supposed to be going to footy training but they’re not going because they’re sick, you need to communicate that.
2. Don’t take or post photos of the kids
You should never post pictures of other people’s kids on social media without the parents’ permission, as this a privacy issue. Some parents don’t want their kids’ names and photos out in public, and you must respect that.
Another thing to consider is that your employer might not want you to even take pictures at all, so always ask first.
3. Don’t be on your phone.
It’s not just taking pictures. You shouldn’t text, talk or use your phone at all while you’re on the job, except to communicate with the parents. Parents are expecting you to be 100% focused on watching their children.
It’s a good idea to just put your phone away in your bag or purse, and check with the parent on how frequently you should check your messages.
4. Don’t smoke, drink or do drugs
Some sitters might think it’s OK to relax with a glass of wine after the kids go to bed, but remember: you’re still on the job while the kids are sleeping. In case they wake up or there’s an emergency, you’ll need to stay sharp and fully responsible.
You should never smoke, consume alcohol or use controlled substances when babysitting. Tobacco use of any kind (even if you go outside) is very unprofessional and often frowned upon by parents.
If you’re a smoker, consider quitting or stocking up on nicotine gum if you’re unsure you’ll make it through the whole job without craving a cigarette.
5. Don’t make the family’s business public
When I asked friends about negative babysitter experiences, several of them mentioned their sitters gossiping or saying negative things about them to others.
Even if you are venting by text to a friend, your complaints could easily get back to your employer, so be careful what you say or type. Even if you’re not complaining, any information should be handled discreetly. For example, if you’re asking an online forum or other babysitters for advice, you always want to keep your employers’ identities and correspondence private.
It’s unprofessional to screenshot and post a message conversation with an employer. If you need advice, post a general, anonymous description of the situation in your own words, not a screenshot.
6. Don’t watch inappropriate shows or videos
Your babysitting job isn’t the place to catch up on Ozark or rewatch Sex and the City.
If a kid comes in and sees you watching scary (or inappropriate) things, you could traumatise them.
May we recommend a little Disney Channel instead?
7. Don’t introduce new or controversial discipline
Before you babysit for the family, it’s important that you’re clear on the rules of the house and how misbehaviour is usually handled. That way, you can implement the same disciplinary strategies the parents usually do—taking away TV time or timeout, for example. In discipline, consistency is important.
And it might be obvious, but babysitters should never abuse, spank or yell at kids.
Basically, if you can’t manage your own behaviour and control your emotions around the child, then you shouldn’t be babysitting.
8. Don’t give kids food or medication without permission
Even if the child has a fever and the parents told you where the Panadol is, you should definitely get permission before administering it.
Also, before the job, ask the child’s parents what specific snacks and/or meals are OK to give them while they’re away. They may only want the child eating certain foods or have house rules about things like lollies or junk food. That way, when the kid asks for something to eat, you know whether or not it’s OK to give it to them. If you’re unsure, even if it seems harmless, you should say no.
After all, it’s not up to the babysitter to make the decision to give the child what they want, as there could be an allergy or the parents may have a rule against it.
9. Don’t host visitors
It might seem fun to invite a friend or a significant other to keep you company while you’re babysitting—babysitters do it all the time in the movies. But this one is another firm no.
By accepting an hourly wage, you’re devoting your time to the family, so you shouldn’t be paying attention to friends. It’s also a liability if your friend comes over and something goes wrong, as you’re responsible for any people you bring into the family’s home.
10. Don’t cross boundaries
Resist the urge to open medicine cabinets, dresser drawers or closet doors unless it’s something you need to do to care for the child, like getting their pyjamas at bedtime. The family you’re babysitting for has welcomed you into their home, but remember that crossing over certain boundaries invades their privacy.
This means no getting on the family’s personal computer, and certainly no logging in to your personal social media account on it. There’s a level of privacy you want to maintain.
There’s also a level of personal space and decorum people expect from their babysitters, so don’t go drinking straight from the milk carton.
11. Don’t cancel at the last minute
When babysitters cancel on families, it can wreck their plans and cause stress. Whether it’s a much-deserved night out or an important work meeting they’re attending, you want to show your employers that you respect their time. So avoid cancelling as much as possible.
Obviously, everyone gets sick from time to time, though, and in that case, you should cancel. Going to a job when you’re sick is definite no-no, as you could make the kids sick too. If you need to cancel because you’re sick, do it at least 24 hours in advance to give the family plenty of time to make alternative arrangements. If it’s less than that, then definitely provide a doctor’s certificate. If you’re working with an agency, they’ll find a replacement. If not, give the family a referral to another babysitter you trust.
12. Don’t forget to clean up after yourself (and the kids)
Babysitting can certainly get hectic, but take a little time to clean up small messes throughout the shift, so they don’t become a huge mess. For example, if the kids take out a toy, have them put it away before moving on to the next activity. If you give them lunch, put the dirty dishes in the dishwasher when they’re done. You may not have been hired to do housekeeping duties, but you are expected to maintain the status quo of the home while you’re there.
After all, parents want consistency with their kids, and to come home to a house they know, with routines observed as usual. If a parent feels they can trust that their instructions and wishes will be followed while you’re there, they will call you again.