If you’ve been providing care for any length of time then I’m sure you know exactly what I am talking about. First of all, interacting with the family members is something that goes hand in hand with caregiving.
Typically, a family member is the one who hires the caregiver for their parent(s) or grandparent(s) because they are unable to provide the care that is needed for them. So, being able to effectively communicate is a very important part of the job. However, what I am more or less referring to is when there are several siblings that don’t get along and the caregiver gets stuck between the parents and the drama that these siblings can create.
This type of situation if left unchecked can create a lot of additional stress and anxiety for the caregiver and have a negative effect on their health and job performance. You would think that these family members that are “grown adults” (50+ yrs old) would behave differently. You know, act their age!
Unfortunately, we are all human and emotions run high when a family members health declines. Each sibling thinks that they are the one who should be the focal point and receive all the communication from the caregiver. Whatever the case may be there are several things you can do to prevent this from happening or implement if your already in the middle of it.
1. Ask the parents who they would like for you to communicate with.
*If there is a power of attorney appointed then this is the person that you would convey information to. Plus, the rest of the family would already know who is appointed as POA which prevents any problems from occurring.
2. Typically in a large family the family member that is closest in miles to their loved one is the one who you would communicate with.
3. If you work for an agency, then you would convey information to the case manager and they would contact the family members.
4. Sometimes families will hold weekly meetings where everyone gets together and information is passed on that way.
There are numerous ways to deal with communication issues and the key is to find out who the “go to” person is when you have your first initial meeting.
I have dealt with some challenging family situations and I have found that bringing the issue to light is the best way to resolve a problem. Do not let it go on for days because then it just snowballs and is harder to deal with. We are all human and having some stranger come into your parents home is not an easy thing to do. However, through compassion and communication you can help ease them through this transitional period which will develop a strong trusting relationship between you and the people you care for.
