I think for many parents it can be really difficult to bond with their teenagers. There seem to be a million different things that just get in the way, including their friends and everything that they’re into. Having a great mother-daughter or father-daughter relationship is really difficult, and it’s something that will change and grow just as your daughter does. The important thing to make time for those bonding moments. Having three girls, I definitely know what it’s like! Keep in mind there will be some times that you do feel distant from your teen and that’s normal. They’re figuring out what it means to be their own individual person.
Do you have any hobbies? Anything that particularly interests you that you’d love to share with your daughter? Whether you cook, knit, sew, race cars, or paint – share that with you daughter. Make her a painting and give it to her, and tell her the story of how you started painting and fell in love with it. Offer to teach her or paint with her. If you love cooking or baking make her a recipe book filled with your favorite recipes and offer to cook together. Offering something personal up about yourself is a great way to talk about her interests, likes, and dislikes to find out more about her.
Suggest a room re-decorate
Who doesn’t love re-decorating their room? Having a fun project together can really open up a dialogue with your daughter about what she’s passionate about and interested in. Take time to listen to how she wants to re-decorate her room and why, what sparks her interest? How can you help her pursue those things?
Take an interest and observe
One thing you can do bond more with you daughter is to just take an interest in what she likes and what she’s doing. Observe her hobbies and things that she seems excited about. Research them and try to bond with her over them. If she expresses interest in something, be receptive to that.
Help with projects and homework
Just being there for you daughter when she needs help can make her comfortable coming to you for help with personal problems. If you are good in a certain field, show her and offer your help. Take interest in her assignments and teach her what you know about a certain topic. Offer to proof-read her essays and give her constructive and not critical feedback.
Encourage her to form friendships
Of course we all want our daughters to be with the family and do family things, but friends are also so important at any age. Foster her healthy friendships and praise her for finding such great supportive friends. Treat her and her friends to a movie night out, or something else that she’s interested in – this can really help her be more apt to want to participate in family events.
