By Libby Ryan
Baby boomers are used to being in charge. Born between 1946 and 1964, members of the generation have been leaders of industry, government and households for most of their lives. So now that it’s time to talk about senior living options, they have some notes on the standard options. They want something different than their parents for their golden years.
“Boomers will not go quietly into their later years, just as they were not quiet during their earlier ones,” says Nancy P. Kropf who holds her doctorate in social work and gerontology and is the Dean of Perimeter College and professor in the School of Social Work at Georgia State University in Atlanta. “They want to be able to make decisions about how they will spend their time,” says Kropf. That includes finding a living situation that suits boomers’ independent mindsets.
Here’s what you should know about boomers’ expectations for senior and retirement living, whether you’re helping your parents plan their next steps or working with boomer clients as a caregiver.
How boomers are handling senior living in their own unique way
Overall, boomers are retiring later and living longer than previous generations, according to the Population Reference Bureau. And that makes a difference in terms of where — and how — they want to live as they age. Here, six ways they’re changing the game.
They’re staying independent longer
Jill Leonard, a 52-year-old writer, says she’s helping her very active parents plan their later years and figuring out their priorities for their next steps. She says her parents are fiercely independent, so the idea of being taken care of doesn’t strike well.
If you’ve been hearing similar talking points during discussions with your parents, you’re not alone. With many boomers working later into life, it’s no surprise they want to retain other aspects of their independence. According to the Care.com’s 2021 Senior Care Outlook Survey, 43% of boomers say they would prefer to age in place, staying in their own homes for as long as they can and continuing their normal routines.
They’re focused on building community
Boomers moving into some level of care facility want options that foster a sense of community. Leonard says her parents’ dream is to find a community of seniors to spend time and enjoy activities with.
Popular choices include:
- Intentional communities, which center individual homes around a public place such as a garden or park.
- Senior cohousing communities, which blend private housing and communal spaces. Cohousing communities are a Scandinavian import that only reached the U.S. in the past 20 years, so boomers are the first generation to jump on the trend. In a senior cohousing community, your parent might have their own bedroom but share a kitchen and living room with other residents — not unlike a college dorm.
Boomers are pushing for fitness centers, spas and frequent activities — almost more like a hotel’s concierge service rather than a traditional retirement home.
They’re hands-on
Kropf says another trait that sets boomers apart from previous generations is their desire to be involved with decision-making whereas their parents’ caregivers might have called the shots.
At the same time, many boomers also want to spend time outside the home, getting involved in their community through volunteering or local politics. That’s because it offers them a sense of belonging and of being involved in something beyond themselves, says Kropf.
That said, you might find it’s beneficial to locate a senior living community where your dad could join the advisory board or your mom could be on a residence council.
They want high-end — and high-tech — amenities
Boomers are pushing for more than their parents’ nursing home arts, crafts and card games. Think fitness centers, spas and frequent activities — almost more like a hotel’s concierge service rather than a traditional retirement home. That includes finding a living situation that can prioritize their hobbies or even ticking off items on their bucket list, notes John Moore, chairman and CEO of Atria Senior Living, which runs assisted living, independent living and memory care across the U.S.
This goes hand-in-hand with the fact that on average, boomers are wealthier than previous generations, holding significantly more wealth than their Gen X and Millennial children, according to Visual Capitalist. For that reason, they want to match the style of life they are used to living. For some, that means the ability to order their favorite meal kit right to their door rather than eating in a shared dining room. For others, it might mean Zumba classes or sightseeing tours to nearby attractions.
Moore adds that boomers are also tech-savvy, so they want a senior living experience that is as modern and up-to-date as they are. This means that senior living facilities catering to boomers offer smart home technology, easy webcam access and, of course, good quality screens to see the grandkids on FaceTime and binge watch “The Great British Bake Off.”
Given the uncertain housing market and economy over the past 20 years, some boomers are questioning what they will be able to afford.
They’re budget-conscious
However, it’s important to note not all boomers have the means to be pushing the envelope for retirement options. While some might be staying in the workforce out of a love for their jobs, many others are facing a longer working life than expected out of financial necessities. Add the uncertain housing market and economy throughout the past 20 years, and some are questioning what they will be able to afford.
“Baby boomers are a diverse cohort group — and no one [senior living] option will meet everyone’s needs,” Kropf notes.
Because it can be challenging for parents to talk candidly about finances with their adult children, make sure to approach the subject carefully. Try not to make assumptions about their financial situations, and be ready for numbers that might surprise you — for better or worse.
They might not want to live nearby
Speaking of FaceTime, boomers are some of the first seniors to be able to virtually share special moments with their children, grandchildren and other loved ones via video calls. So while some folks might want to be just down the road from family, others might dream of a retirement plan that allows them to live somewhere further afield – even if they adore their grandkids.
“I heard one grandparent say that she loves when her grandkids come over for a visit, and she loves when they leave,” Knopf says. “Don’t assume that your parents will want to relocate to the place where you live so they can spend every day with their grandkids.”
How to find a boomer-friendly housing option
If you’re starting your search for a new home for your folks, keep these pointers in mind.
Shop for amenities. Boomers won’t want to settle for monotonous activity options like card games and crafts – and they don’t have to. Instead, look for programs that combine physical, mental and even spiritual wellness, says Kropf. Think exercise classes or continuing education courses at local colleges. Moore also stresses the importance of in-room technology as boomers are increasingly tech-savvy.
Make sure their voices will be heard. Ask about resident councils or advisory boards to make sure your parents could get involved in how their new home is run.
Think about community engagement. Does the senior living center you’re looking at offer volunteering opportunities in the local community? Kropf notes that even the best living situation might not be fulfilling on its own; seniors need the chance to get involved at a local church, city council or even community organizing.
Style matters. Look for spaces that are bright and modern. Think more like a fashionable hotel where you’d like to vacation together rather than grandma-chic with pastel wallpaper. That’s a clue they’ll be ready to cater to your boomer parents rather than sticking with the old-school styles your grandparents expected.
Take it slow. As a boomer herself, Kropf has advice for children helping their boomer folks plan: Don’t assume that you know what your parents want or need. What you might imagine as your ideal senior living situation 30 years down the line might not be what your 65- or 75-year-old parent is looking for right now, she explains.
The “most important” bottom line, according to Kropf: “Handle the situation with care, compassion and love.”
Libby Ryan is a freelance journalist and editor covering health, culture and travel.
