By now, you’ve all heard about the horrific tragedy that took place at a gay nightclub in Orlando on Sunday, one that took the lives of 50 people and injured at least 50 more. There are a lot of rumors circulating about the attack right now, but you can go to sites like CNN.com and NBCNews.com that have been doing an excellent job of updating their articles and websites as more and more details are being confirmed by authorities.
We’ve heard that the gunman, Omar Mateen, had previously made comments to his father that he had seen two men kissing and that that had upset him. We’ve also heard that, at some point during the night, Mr. Mateen made a call to 911 during which he pledged his allegiance to ISIS. Even though we don’t know how truthful these rumors are, we do know this: the violence that occurred at that nightclub was driven by pure, unadulterated hate. Specifically, hate driven by intolerance and a fear of the unknown.
Our country has seen its fair share of violence, gun-related or otherwise, in the past ten years: the shootings at Virginia Tech, the Boston Marathon bombing, and the San Bernadino massacre, to name a few. In each case, the perpetrator was driven to senselessly kill scores of unwitting victims because of hate. Hate, paired with an utter apathy and disdain for the pain they would and could cause for others. What’s even more upsetting is the fact that these kinds of tragedies aren’t so few and far between like we’d like to think; if anything, the number of violence-related deaths is growing at an exceedingly alarming rate.
But, as parents, we have the power to change this pattern. We have the opportunity to use the recent events in Orlando to teach our children about respect and tolerance. These kinds of events are already so difficult for adults to wrap their heads around, so how could we possibly get kids to understand? How could we possibly explain to our children that there are people out there who are so driven by a hate and fear of others that they would kill them?
As difficult and daunting as these conversations are, we NEED to start having them with our kids. We can no longer argue that we are protecting them by ignoring the fact that there is violence and hatred and bigotry in the world. In fact, we are potentially putting them at greater risk by NOT talking about them. As the adage goes, “Those who fail to learn history are doomed to repeat it.” If we truly want to protect our children, we need to help them learn from our past tragedies so that they can prevent them in the future. And this starts by teaching our children to love, not hate.
Tell me: how have you had the conversation with your children about tolerance and acceptance?
Have you used the “Golden Rule” as an example? Do you have other models or ideas that you prefer?
How have you explained the idea of hate to your children? How have you made it clear to them that hate isn’t the answer?
Are you planning on having a conversation about the Orlando shooting with your child? If so, here are some suggestions for how you can have a conversation about violence with kids of any age.
